Recognition

Its only one way to communicate

But lately its been nothing but troubling due to the role I wish you would play

Make sure you save the date

Because when you decide to become a man then I’m here to wait

Wash away your tears because my love for you wont go away

I just have to take a break

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A Mans Alley

I’m sorry that I broke our promise

You said you loved me but your love never qualified for the proper ” I do’s”

I should’ve known that you were just a man passing through

I wanted you for many years but our time spent is now running out

Yes I have many doubts

I’m afraid of how things may turn out

I’m not over you

I’m just done with the old you

Right now in my life I can’t make exceptions for the role you choose

I just know that I have to move on without you

Your a good man , but a man without the proper walking shoes

Unlucky You

It’s hard to read between the lines

When your the one hiding between all the false ties

It’s like one day I love you then you make me hate you because all I seem to see is the ghost hiding within you

The attention starts to fade

And then I start wondering what it would be like to step out my comfort zone and begin to date

I thought us being together would be our potential fate

All I can see is my life being tied up into a man feeling held back and trapped inside a crate

“Break free”, she says

“You’ll find another man meant for you”, he says

But nothing will ever compare to what I’ve found

Because when I was down he made sure I never kept that frown

When I was laying in bed thinking of all my failure he made me see that all I’ve done was for the better

No one will love me the way he did

You just made me throw away all my sanity

Are you happy now daddy ?

Under ATTACK

Remember the girl hiding behind the silk sheets

The one that hides all the lies between her teeth

The one that cant seem to maintain her sanity

The one who can barely breathe

Feels like every second someone is choking me

See thats called anxiety

When you can barely see the good in life

You just want to grab the knife and rip open all the parts that dont seem right

Its complicated because no matter how you express yourself someone cant relate so you sit there and contemplate on wheater its time to take a chance or count your days

Its even worse when you have bad days

Like today, You want to scream and shout just let it all out but you cant

You cant even open your mouth

Because your afraid of what words may come out

Im trapped inside my own body

I need help but instead I try to fix my own mental health

I go against what i know will help

but its life right like everyone else say

Your too sensitive

You care to much about what people say

But truthfully im the only one whose waiting for her death day

So she can leave this world and have no worries just herself and her angels

So dont cry because she’ll rather be gone than stand here fighting all alone by herself

“Let her go” , she says

wash away

Act like a lady

She says

Wear your natural hair

“It’s beautiful “

She says

Wash away those tears

Which she never sees

Cross your legs, sit up straight

Be someone your not

She says

And see how that turns out for you

All you want to do is change me

What if I’m perfect enough just for me

Is that not good enough for you

Why can’t you accept me?

Why can’t I fix you?

She says

 

Loving You Is My Battlefield

Open your heart for me

Because I’m tired of fighting alone

I’ve given you everything in me to prove how much I’m willing to fight for you

Loving you is nothing but a battlefield

Even when I’m fighting alone

I’m willing to wait for you to fight for me too along the way but four years has past by and I have yet to see  you go to war for me

Can you carry my heart in your  hand like you carry that gun so close to your heart

Are you able to get on one knee and prove your love to me

If the answer is no

I refuse to keep on loving you and waiting for the gun to drop

I’ll walk away and go fight on another battlefield

Loving you has done nothing but improve you

Only giving myself half of me

Loving you is my battlefield and I’m ready to call off duty

 

 

 

 

I’m Not The Woman I Claim to be

All I ever wanted was for someone to see me because at the end of the day I’m not the woman I claim to be

There is something deep within me that gives me the knowledge that I am not the woman I use to be

Hiding behind the silk sheets

The love I have  is still sweet even though I was poisoned by the man of foolery

Standing side by side as we should be

Whispering in my ear

This relationship is my fear

Only wondering why am I still  here

Should I be fighting for something that isn’t even clear

All I could ever do is shed a tear

SEE ME

I am not the woman I claim to be

All I ever did was hide behind those silk sheets